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Unnamed

  • Posted on August 25, 2013 at 10:13 am
Monsal Dale and Viaduct

Your name is carved in the high vaulted arches in Monsal Dale where the viaduct runs, trackless, still. It is woven into the river, meandering, finding its slow rhythm in a wide plain, lying with the cattle. It is spoken in the wind, by the wings of swifts, caught in the trees and on every familiar track, played, replayed. Like the summer heat, cupped and held in this green bowl, you can never be absent, because you have been so present. And here I am, a guest. Why is my name not known, as yours? Not spoken with love in…

Unorthodox icon

  • Posted on July 28, 2013 at 10:26 am
Orthodox icon

I have a lasting memory of black and gold religious icons of a revered madonna. Mysterious, impassive, unjoyous. And I have abiding memories from my religious experiences of feeling that something about me was deeply wicked and unspeakable. Somehow there was a connection, and patriarchy and male enforcement was common ground. This is deeply feminist, but I do not mean to offend anyone. However, largely as a result of religious views, I had no voice; I could not speak. I was illegitimate. Icons are part of our culture still, if not religious. But they are co-opted, made by and for…

Patterns

  • Posted on July 27, 2013 at 7:45 am

I swear my printer says ‘rhubarb, rhubarb’
as it swings its head and spits politely on the page,
writes my words with rainbows.

It’s why I know you across a crowded bar
and have said hello to strangers by mistake
to colour with apologies in red.

It’s why there are trees on my winter glass
and Virgin Marys sanctify burnt toast
for the blessed mistaken in brown.

And clouds are far countries where peace
reigns despite the castles melting into hills,
or that chimeras rear their fleeced heads.

The rain drips random from roof to sill
lulls my sleep, while a strict tap tortures me
in Chinese: tacked and tock-sick to the second.

And clocks with pendulums synchronise
when left in a room alone, like nuns whose
months listen to each other, ignore the moon.

It’s why molecules love each other or repel
in blind recognition of affinity for how
everything falls together, or falls apart.

Make patterns and everything fits. Life
tessellates, minds made whole; vacuums
are shapeless; we hate them to death.

So we invent patterns as comforts, patchwork
hexagons mimicking bees to leave no space
and fill them with sweet nothings.

Comb our recognitions and reassurances,
find the illusions and pretence. Fillers for those
things we need to learn and now shall not.

Computers work so hard at what we do
without thinking; pattern recognition makes
automation easy as the mistaken friend.

Then Mary says ‘rhubarb’ across a crowded bar,
writing trees on the window and tapping your name.
Your pendulum swings to hers and you’re safe.

 

2011 © Andie Davidson

Through my eyes

  • Posted on June 22, 2013 at 8:44 am

Never mind the shoes, never mínd the mile
climb up inside me, reach over my smile

Adjust your seat, be comfy, and rise
until without strain you see through my eyes

Watch me knock, push the bell, and feel the start
where love is a stranger – yet still draws my heart

Scan books that tell stories of holidays and times
I, reading science and she, reading crimes

Climb steps to the loft, find childhoods stored
rummage things forgotten, and toys once adored

Feel grass underfoot where I mowed, where I lay
smell the flowers, stroke the cats, let it all go away

Clear the shed where the wood is cut into shapes
of parts of my home, of my heart, of my hopes

And now watch me turn, watch me leave it behind
see the images blur until we are blind

Is it something I said? Is it something I did?
Was I harsh or unloving? Infidelities hid?

Did I fall? Did I fail, for this all to be gone?
It was none of these things, just the way I was born.

 

2013 © Andie Davidson

Discharged memories: two

  • Posted on May 27, 2013 at 10:59 am

Tangle of wires, these threads of   life
disconnects between phones with   histories
conversations now lost in silence   in a drawer
in a box of decisions,   of memories
 
electrical elements, complex,   elementary
useful without understanding,   currency
with potential to make happen,   to make happy
sad, lose, lose times, lose friends,   lives
 
lost in a box of decisions, to keep,   rejoin
find phones, find friends, find family,   or
finally forget and forgive and forsake,   spread,
on a carpet of decisions, coil,   lay out
 
in a mortician’s pattern of cold   calm the
inevitability, the undertaking,   tears
of the accepting bereaved. Nothing   flowing
in the untangling, connections draw   out
 
together again, in the box, in the drawer,   in this
burial of so many a departed   conversation.

 

2013 © Andie Davidson